This coming Sunday I was asked to lead a women’s ensemble for the special music in the worship service. Our practices were slowly whittled down to one because of the weather. Pastor and I discussed it and decided to reschedule until next month.

Then he asked if I would sing the special. I was okay with that and agreed immediately.

I like to find a song that supports the message. Pastor’s topic is mercy. I went searching through CBD (Christian Book Distributors) and listening on youtube. Here’s the song I think I’m going to do:

But what is mercy?

Each time I found a definition and started reading I began to weep, overwhelmed by the mercy I have experienced in my life.

Here are a couple definitions I found.

From TEKTON Apologetics: Pilch and Malina note that in an ancient context, “mercy” is better rendered as “gratitude” or “steadfast love.” One example of the expression of mercy would be “the debt of interpersonal obligations for unrepayable favors received.” For a case like this, to say, “Lord, have mercy!” (Matt. 20:31) means, “Lord, pay up your debt of interpersonal obligation to us!” Not a plea of the hapless, it is in this case a request to pay back previously earned favor (as a loyal subject of the Davidic/Messianic dynasty).

Grace is getting what we don’t deserve and mercy is not getting what we do deserve.

Biblically: 17 For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. (John 3:17, NIV)

The Bible story that defines/describes mercy for me is the story of the man who is forgiven a huge debt. It was the equivalent of millions of dollars. There is no way possible for him to repay it. And the debt is forgiven. He meets up with someone who owes him a fraction of what he was just forgiven and he demands payment. It doesn’t end well for him (see Matthew 18:21-35).

I don’t get the unmerciful servant. First, I don’t get how he could run up such a huge debt. And then to not be changed. I’m mystified. I just don’t get it.

Every time I think about my debt being paid, forgiven…I choke up and feel so unworthy.

Every time I look at my husband, I marvel at his love for me. I don’t deserve it. Yet it’s there.

Every time I am allowed to teach a class, lead a Bible study, sing in worship, speak at a gathering…I’m humbled beyond description.

And grateful.

Thank you for Your mercy.

Happy dancin’


That glow coming from Ashland, Ohio is me smiling as the dark cloud has been lifted. Do I feel any different? Not really. I still feel like I’m a walking bruise, from the top of my head to the literal bottom of my feet. But I saw the rheumatologist today and her report has me a hundred shades of happy.

The tests that she ordered show that I do not have rheumatoid arthritis, or lupus, or hepatitis (thanks to those shots I got many years ago). My sed rate is normal. I am no longer anemic. My kidneys and liver are working well.

What I do have is inflammation and fibromyalgia. And while these are not to be taken lightly, they are things that I know I can work with and find much support for. The doctor wants to wean me off the prednisone…slowly. So for the next 30 days I’ll continue on the 10mg and then I’ll drop to 5mg. I start taking a low dose prescription to address the inflammation.

So what is different? The dark cloud of not knowing is gone. The fear of something being wrong, of life changing drastically, of…well, just not being sure what was going to happen next are gone, gone, gone!

And I am so thank-full. I just wanted to let you know.

Thanksgiving Thanks

I’m full of thanks for family, food, and football. I’m thankful that my daughters and grandchildren will be in my home today. I’m thankful that I am married to a man who loves to cook and is really, really good at it. And it goes without saying how happy I am to enjoy football with my family.

I’m blessed. I know it and I’m thank-full.

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