Lessons From An Earworm

Have you ever opened your eyes in the morning having a song instantly filling your mind? Have you carried a song around all day after someone mentioned the title or lyric? Have you ever had it go on and on and on for days? According to Wikipedia, this phenomenon is referred to as “sticky music” or “stuck song syndrome.

Whatever you want to call it, I have experienced this, and I am definitely feeling like it’s stuck!

I can’t find the exact commercial that is guilty of planting this phrase in my brain. I don’t remember that part. I just did a youtube search with the sticky phrase and came up with a recording by The Faces and then again by Rod Stewart. I didn’t remember any of the other words, just the one line/phrase from the chorus. I don’t remember listening to it in my youth. I didn’t know the title at all. If you had talked about the song and its title without mentioning my stuck phrase, I wouldn’t have known what you were talking about. (I remember Rod Stewart, but not The Faces.)

Have you guessed the phrase yet? Here it is: “I wish that I knew what I know now when I was younger.” If you want to hear the whole song you can search the phrase, or the title, “Ooh La La.”

Here’s the thing: it’s stuck in my brain, on a loop that rarely goes away. So when I woke up this morning to this phrase—which by the way I then have to sing in my head several times to get the phrase rhythmically exact, not sure why by now it doesn’t just appear correctly—I decided to reflect on it in writing here. Not sure where this is going to come out, since I’m doing some live sorting, reflecting, and recording. Here goes…

I have friends and acquaintances who say they live with no regrets. I sometimes think I must be living in a different world than them, or just done more awful and hurtful stuff because I have many regrets. I recently participated in a cool poem creating thing that was the accumulation of the things people would tell their younger self if they got the chance. It made me think of the things I would tell myself “when I was younger.”

I wonder what the people I know, who say they have no regrets, would do with my brain-phrase. When I’ve asked how it can be that they have no regrets, they respond by telling me that everything they’ve done has made them who they are. They like who they are. They learned from all their experiences and wouldn’t change anything.

Really? (Imagine me shaking my head once again in disbelief.)

I kinda sorta get that who I am today is the product of my decisions/choices in the past. Yes, I’m in a pretty good place, and I know that to “go back” and change any ONE thing would mean NOW would or could be quite different.

Here’s another thought that occurred to me on one of the days when I couldn’t shake this perpetual earworm. Could our younger self handle this mature knowledge and perspective we’ve acquired? Would they listen to us any better than their parents, teacher, or mentors when they attempt to speak wisdom into their young lives?

Having deep sorrow for my wrong and hurtful choices makes me a more sensitive and kinder me now. There is no way to go back and undo what has been done. And I’m somewhat familiar with who I was, and I seriously doubt I would have listened. I would have justified or rationalized my choices. So perhaps I should spend my time becoming the best me, the me who I want to live with for whatever time I have left.

Whenever that sticky phrase crowds back into my head, I’m going to sing it like this: I wish I lived what I have learned, it makes me much better.

Yep, that works and I’ve got that rhythm down pat.

Erasing History…Or Just Your Version

I’m getting tired of people who are saying the people who are protesting and demanding that white supremacy monuments are trying to erase history.

They aren’t.

Unless you believe that yours is the only version of history that matters. 

The more I listen and read, the more I realize the history I was spoon fed in school was whitewashed—cleansed of the rich heritage of others. BIPOC history, with all it’s richness, was swapped out for a misrepresentation or ignoring of how land was gained and jobs got done. Assimilation was the mandate. 

As we discussed this over breakfast, my mother made a comment that was insightful. She said that white supremacy didn’t start once people landed on these shores. Nope. I came on the boats. And our founders didn’t stray far from their roots. They may have tried to hide behind the words in their documents, but they didn’t mean that everyone was created equal, or deserved life, liberty, and happiness. No. That was reserved for those whose skin was like theirs.

What if instead of being afraid of what really happened—or continues to happen—we truly educated ourselves on what transpired, on what has been denied or ignored. What if we read…and listened. What if we made room for others. 

Maybe we really could learn something from history.

Message Meme: Family Trees

6AF9D329-BE15-4831-8807-025631E05505

Have you noticed the growth in companies where you can find your DNA and roots in your family tree? The top ones, according to a google search (now I’m going to get a landslide of ads since they think I’m interested now—whatever happened to just doing research?) are: MyHeritage; Ancestry (because everyone wants a leaf); Living DNA; Vitagene; 23andMe; and GPS Origins. Wikipedia listed the options alphabetically and had 36 in their list.

Have your researched your family tree? Why all the interest? And, does it really matter?

I remember as a child watching with utter fascination as my great-grandmother unrolled a large piece of very old looking paper reavealing our family tree. This historical piece took my family line all the way back to William Bradford. I knew the name because I studied about him in school! My awe and excitement bubbled up and over.

Why do we seek to know our genetic history and connections to the past? I believe God made us this way. Our spiritual wiring is all about connection and relationship.

So it’s not surprising to me that when God gave Moses the fifth commandment, the one that begins to address our horizontal relationships, he begins at home. And he begins with staying connected.

In the commercials for the different DNA searching companies, the people who are telling their stories are finding pride in their ethnicity—in where they’re from and their newly found identiies.

I can’t fill in a lot of the boxes in my family tree. Sometimes that makes me sad. Then I remember my spiritual tree goes back to a garden. Not all my ancestors have pretty stories. But my bottom line is this: I am a child of God.

Rebuilding With Nehemiah, Chapter 9 Day 5

Friday: Do We Learn From History?

Text: 16 “But they, our ancestors, became arrogant and stiff-necked, and they did not obey your commands. 17 They refused to listen and failed to remember the miracles you performed among them. (Neh. 9:16-17a)

Neh 9 history words

Teach: Reading through Nehemiah 9:16-30 we find the ups and downs of God’s people. Their experience is summed up pretty well in our text for today. What was the root of their up and down relationship? Arrogance, disobedience, and lack of remembering. They forgot how they got to where they were. They began to think they could handle things all on their own. And as a result the walked in disobedience.

Take: Remember. So often we live as spiritual amnesiacs. Some of Jesus’ final words to his followers came at the Last Supper: this do in remembrance of me. Don’t forget. Daily Bible reading isn’t merely an exercise to cross off our “to do” list. It’s the process by which we keep on remembering.

Task: What miracles has God performed in your life? Take time to remember, and give thanks.

Neh 9 history