Category: Life

Shrove Tuesday Thoughts

WP weight scale.jpg

Why do you diet? When I was younger, a certain number (whether it was clothing size or poundage) was the goal. I had a friend who was so tiny and I just wanted to be like that. Small equated with beautiful. Now, it’s not about size or number, it’s about health and the ability to keep up with my grandkids.
WP shrove tuesday.jpg
Why do you give things up during Lent? I’m following a devotional guide that was published for 2006. It makes the days off a little. Like today’s was about Shrove Tuesday. I learned a few things. For example, this was the day that those observant Christians would clear out the cupboards of the foods “not permitted” during lent. Those would include fat (hence the name Fat Tuesday), eggs, meat, and milk. It was the day of celebrating before the more solemn time of confession, reflection, and preparation to receive the joy of Easter.

WP indians.jpg

A few years ago there was quite a stir in the baseball town near me. Opening day was on Good Friday and good Christians who happen to be good Indian fans were in a quandary. How would they ever be able to enjoy a game without having a hot dog? Some went so far as to ask for special dispensation from the church. Isn’t that just like us?

We look at dieting as giving things up to get to a magical number, instead of what it is. Our diet is what we eat—all the time and every day. We either have a healthy diet or an unhealthy one. And it’s all about the long run. Spiritually, we need to adopt the same understanding. A verse came to mind while I putting this together. It’s originally found in the Old Testament, and Jesus picks it up in his teachings. The Shema tells us we are to love the Lord our God with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength. Jesus adds that we are also to love our neighbor as our self. Now that’s a spiritual diet we can live with!

Imagine it. How would life look if every choice we made was determined by whether the outcome would move us closer to completely loving God? Not just during Lent, but when we’re on summer vacation, or whenever. And you might be getting ready to assure me that you do that already, and have done it since you became a believer. Be careful how you justify yourself, Jesus may call you to deeper service (see Luke 10).

So, how’s your diet going this Lenten season? What have you gained by filling up and focusing more lovingly on the one who knows you best and loves you most?

WP shema.jpg

 

Do No Harm

First, do no harm.

Quick! Where’s that from?

hippocratic

Hippocratic Oath? That’s what I thought.

Nope. After doing a little online reading, I found it’s not in the original Greek version. There’s a phrase in the Latin that might come close. It is believed the phrase came into acceptance somewhere in the 17th century.

Why does this matter? What drove me to even look?

I’m glad you asked.

Yesterday, on my drive to visit some folks who are completing a drug rehab program, I had a heart to heart with God.

At first I was trying to anticipate conversations and how I would respond. Okay, I confess I think these kinds of thing through for all kinds of encounters. I’m an old Girl Scout: I tried to always be prepared.

But the rehearsals in my mind were going nowhere.

So I stopped—talking not driving.

And I confessed how foolish I felt and I asked God what I needed to do.

Yes, I’m a trained pastor (two different Masters degrees for that) and a trained counselor (Masters degree and all kinds of continuing education), but we’re facing a giant of an enemy in this heroin epidemic.

This must be how David felt when he faced Goliath. (Okay, go ahead think current Pepsi commercials. See video below if you’re unfamiliar.)

God, I don’t know what to say. I want to offer your kind of lasting, life-changing, life-giving help. How do I do that?

 I know, not a very eloquent prayer—didn’t even say Amen at the end.

But God heard. And God spoke: Do No Harm.

donoharm.jpg

This is a huge request for an ESFP with ADD. I am not like my introverted friends who think and then overthink and maybe think some more before they open their mouths to speak. I think out loud. Words tumble out of my mouth faster than I can check them.

How do I do that?

Here’s what I did:

I listened. A challenging thing for an ESFP with ADD.

Listening requires intentional focus. Trust me: this requires more energy than a 30 minute workout at CURVES.

But I did it.

And I shared what I knew to be true.

This included some of my own struggle, but also a couple of my foundation scripture promises and fundamental counseling truths.

I’m not sure if we slayed the giant…but we did some serious damage. I left those appointments whoopin’ and hollerin’ for Jesus.

These were divine appointments and I was just along for the ride.

Check back for the next post where I’ll share one of those fundamental counseling truths.  (How’s that for a teaser?!)

 

**ESFP is a Myers-Brigs Trait Inventory designation (MBTI). When I take the inventory I identify as an Extrovert who takes in my surroundings through my Senses, makes judgments through my Feelings, and organizes Perceptively (which is kind of like no organization at all—think scattered).

If you want to check out the test just google it. You can take it online and receive your information.

**ADD is a psychiatric identification, Attention Deficit Disorder. My brain typically runs in scatter mode. I act before thinking. I get overwhelmed by too many instructions. I am highly distracted…squirrel!

 

 

Book Review: Listen, Love, Repeat

listen love repeat.jpg

I get  opportunities to read and recommend books. It’s been a long time since I was this excited about a book. It is a rare thing to find a nonfiction book that  blends and balances “how to”, biblical resources, and personal testimony–Karen Ehman does that in this book!

Honest. Practical. Needed. These are the things this book offers, page after page after page. Author, Karen Ehman, packs so much into this book. The chapters identify different groups and individuals who need to receive the practical experience of God’s grace—and the specific ways we can extend His love to them. The timeliness of this book is matched beautifully by the timelessness of message: moving from self-centered me-ness to being focused on others.

As a pastor of a church in the heart of a small town, I believe this book offers tools my people can use to be encouraged in new and refreshed ways. One of the chapters I read through tears was “The Lonely and Unloved.” One of the questions found near the end of this chapter were an arrow to my heart: Can you create one more space at your table this week? Yes, I can…but will I?

This book is like a box of seeds. Plant these seeds (ideas and principles), and watch what grows! I am looking forward to sharing this book in my church and seeing the amazing things God has in store for us as we step up to new ways of listening and loving.

(I received a free copy of this book to provide an honest review.)

Resting

(This is a reposting of a Facebook Note from November 1, 2009)

WP broken clock

Where I work I spend most of my time in two rooms, the kitchen and dining room. They are open to each other. In those two rooms there are four clocks. Should I venture into either bathroom there’s a clock there, too. I never have to wonder or worry about what time it is.

Time. When we think about it we wonder what time it is. We wonder if we’re late or early. How much time do we have? What do we do with our time? We’re accused of wasting time, marking time, stretching time, and watching time fly by.

I used to rush through my days. I was proud of how much I could cram into a day. More was always better and therefore, resulted in a better me. When I gave up sleep to focus on saving the world (or at least my little corner), I made some of the stupidest and most dangerous decisions, decisions that nearly cost me everything, including my life. I finally came to the conclusion that there is a reason that God rested and a reason that he commands it of us, as well.

This morning was the time to change our clocks. It was time to “fall back.” While others were relishing an extra hour of sleep, I was awake and at my computer. I was reveling in the quiet. All I could hear was the rhythm of the clocks ticking around me. Now maybe if I only had that to listen to 24/7, it would become tortuous, but sitting here this morning, it was a Centering Symphony.

I was up “early” because someone imposed a time change on me. Isn’t that just how life seems to go? We grouse and complain because our time is not our own. Someone always seems to be demanding our time.

Recently, I was a t a retreat where the leaders took the watches and phones of the participants. The surrender was to free those attending from the tyranny of time. The thinking was/is to let the staff “worry” about time and schedule. Good as it was, the staff always had someplace for the participants to go or something for them to do, so there was no sense of “free time.”

Compare that to the experience of our house guest. We have a couple unoccupied rooms in our home, so we opened our space to a pastor friend who was between jobs with no place to stay. The first couple weeks she was with us, all she did was sleep, eat, and watch TV. Our interactions were minimal. Slowly, opportunities and necessities began to reenter her life and she began to go out with friends and go to some meetings. One day she came through the living room where I was reading. She sat and we chatted for a while. At the end of our talking, she shared how much she appreciated the opportunity to just be there with no expectations, just able to rest. It was the refreshing that she needed at every level of her being: heart, mind, soul, and strength.

In the great Shepherd Psalm (Psalm 23), we find so much of the care provided to and for us. One of the things we may overlook is that he who knows us and our needs makes us lie down. Thinking of this reminded me of my grandson. I can always tell when Asher needs a nap. Some days so can he. Don’t make the Shepherd bop you on the head with his crook to get you to rest. We were not created to go 24/7.

One day as Jesus was ministering, he looked out at the crowd and was moved to compassion when he saw how weary and out of synch they were. He offered them rest, to restore their rhythm. To receive this gift they needed to come to him and learn from him. Don’t you think it’s time to listen, to learn, to rest?

Tracing and Anticipating

I wrote this in 2009 and posted it as a note on Facebook–it came up as “memories” reminder. I’m reposting it and will edit it later. I needed the message.

wp-tracing-abc

Our three year old grandson, Asher, started pre-school this fall. From the get go, we knew he was a bright child. He even came on his due date. We watched Baby Einstein videos with him until we all knew them by heart. Very early, he knew his shapes, colors, letters, and numbers.

At Pre-school they are teaching the kids their letters and numbers and having them trace them. Asher walks around with his left hand in the air, at the ready for the next thing to trace. If he isn’t tracing the letters, he’s counting how many characters or letters are in the word or string of words. He traces letters on the TV, on boxes, on books, from the newspaper, or on the shirt someone has on. One day, I found him sitting on the floor in the dining room. We have a shelf there with accident/spare clothes for him. He had all his spare shirts lying out and his own shirt off. When I asked what he was doing he looked at me with that “isn’t it obvious, Mema” look. Then, as matter of factly as he could, he informed me that he was tracing. Every letter around him screams to be traced!

Reflecting on Asher’s tracing, I began to see three components that made Asher such a good tracer. First, he walked through his day, minute by minute and room by room, anticipating, no expecting, that there would be letters to trace or count. What do you eagerly anticipate? A quick read of Romans 8 paints a clear picture of what we need to be anticipating.

Anticipating that God is at work, that he has a plan and it includes us, drives us, spurs us, motivates us to be ready. Asher walks around expecting to find something to trace. His little hand is often in the air, making circles, like an airplane getting ready to land. The word tells us we are to be ready, to always have an answer when someone asks us what are hope is about.

Could you do that? I’m not asking if you know some specific plan or canned presentation. I don’t care if you have scripture memorized, but can you (from a sincere heart) tell someone, “This is where I was. This is what God in Christ did for me. And this is where I’m headed.” It’s your story, are you ready to tell it?

And finally, I have been so impressed by Asher’s focus. His questions reveal his passion to learn more. He listens to all our conversations. I know this because often my words come back to me through him. It has caused me to be more conscious of what I say and how I say it. We’ve even had to resort to spelling things we want to keep above his head. Everything he sees is an item to trace. If he’s not tracing letters, then his finger runs around the circumference or perimeter of an item. Some days he carries his step stool from room to room so that he can be sure to catch whatever you’re doing.

Right now Asher seems to be practicing the fine art of learning. It reminded me of Brother Lawrence’s continual practice of the awareness of God. And I started to wonder: what keeps me from anticipating God at every turn? Do I have preconceived and limiting notions about who God is and what he can do? What keeps me from being ready? Is it fear, or busyness, or ignorance of the urgency, or God help us: lack of love? What keeps me from being focused? The enemy is the expert at divide and conquer. If he can get us to thinking in terms of sacred and secular, he knows it’s just a short distance disconnecting our head and heart.

When I was in seminary the second time around, a Sunday School teacher asked our younger daughter, Beth (Asher’s mom), what she wanted to be when she grew up. Beth’s answer struck the teacher enough that she made sure to tell me. Beth’s answer was, “a student like my mom.” There is always a need for us to put into practice what we know, but oh, that God would rekindle in each of us the insatiable desire to learn.

Then we would, like Asher, be anticipating, ready, and focused.

wp-asher-scrabble-3

Samuel and a Teachable Moment

I have spent so many hours watching the Olympics this past week. I have let my reading and writing slip to the periphery.

Then I read my friend, Evelyn Mann’s article about an incident that happened with her son. Read it here: Miracle Man

If you have children, work with children, or live near children take time to consider Evelyn’s suggestions for ways to bridge the wonderment and answer the questions.

Samuel is an amazing child. Catch his joy!

 

On Complaining…Or Not

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord my whole life long. (Psalm 23:6, NRSV)

On a past trip to visit my mom in Arizona I came to a new awareness. It wasn’t completely new, but it sure hit me in a new kind of way: I have very little tolerance with complaining. Let me clarify. I believe that there is room for dissatisfaction and the proper communicating of that. My problem is with people…like a woman at the movie theater.

Mom and I decided we were going to see the movie, “The Proposal.” Romantic comedies are one of my favorite genres of films (followed closely by Disney animation). I was pretty excited to see the film, partly because I like the star, Sandra Bullock, but also because it was nice to see a grown up movie (a grandma’s dilemma). We were standing in a line waiting to buy our tickets when a woman came in with a group and immediately began to complain. The line was too long. She wasn’t going to get a good seat. Couldn’t they afford to get adequate help so she didn’t have to wait? On and on she went.

When we got into the theater, even though it was a multiplex, she was seated right behind us. I don’t think she skipped a beat and went right on complaining, loud enough for everyone around her to hear (which was pretty loud, keeping in mind this is a retirement community). The upcoming movie ads were too long. The theater was too cold. The seats were too hard. Sandra Bullock was too thin. The movie was too predictable.

When I had enough, I leaned over to Mom and told her I was about ready to stuff a sock in the woman’s mouth. I wouldn’t have done it, but it was a tempting thought. After the movie Mom and I were laughing about it. Then she turned serious and informed me complaining is a way of life for the people down there. That ended the discussion, but not my thinking about it.

I am still mystified why retired folk in Arizona would be complaining. Sure it’s warm, okay hot, but it’s a dry heat. On that visit people were complaining about 30% humidity while the humidity back home in Ohio was over 100%. They live in beautiful homes, surrounded by amazing scenery. They are retired so all they have is time, but they complain about waiting. I just don’t get it.

I decided to make sure that it was complaining that I had the biggest problem with, so I checked the definition out on dictionary.com. The distinction that stuck out most clearly to me was the between expressing dissatisfaction and a constant whining complaining about everything. It wasn’t occasional dissatisfaction that bothered me, but that seemingly total frustration and complaint about everything that really grates on me. One of the descriptions is “to whine like a spoiled child.” And that hit it right on the head for me. Whiners and complainers walk around exuding some kind of sense of entitlement that irritates me to no end. That’s what got to me about the woman at the movie. She seemed to feel she was entitled to immediate attention, and seating, and the perfect movie experience.

As I read all the way through the definitions I found that they listed an antonym at the end. The antonym for complain is rejoice. How perfect is that! Paul admonishes the Philippians to do all things without grumbling or complaining. He moves through a discussion on growing spiritually deep and hits with pretty solid intensity their need to rejoice. And he says it again, probably louder and more forcefully: Rejoice! James echoes the teaching by telling the readers of his letter to “count it ALL joy.”

At one of the darkest and most shame-full periods of my life, not even my typically optimistic and sanguine personality seemed to be much help. I had to make a conscious effort to be thankful. I had to look for things to rejoice about. The more I looked, the more I found. The more I found, the better I felt, and the more joy that became apparent to others. The shame wasn’t erased, but the heaviness was lifted. I was surrounded by much whining and complaining but all I could feel was an abiding gratitude for the way God was bringing me through. I was in a dark, dark valley, but goodness and mercy walked me enabling me to avoid the grumbly pitfalls and come out on the side of joy.

Maybe that’s why I get easily irritated by the complaining and whining of others. I know where I’ve been and how easily it would have been to give up. But honestly, what good does whining and complaining do? I haven’t seen one occasion where it has made the situation better. Whereas, I have seen the insertion of thankfulness and joy into an otherwise abysmal situation make all the difference—for the good—in the world!

So don’t make me take out my sock! Things not going well? Look for what is and plant the seed of thankfulness. Who are your traveling mates on the journey? If they aren’t Goodness and Mercy, then beat feet away from the negativity and soak in the grace that will release you into joy! Who you travel with and how you travel is really up with you. You want some control? Control that!

 

 

Teaser: A Mary Like Me

BR A Mary Like Me.teaser.jpg

I’m not ready to review this book. But I want to let you know that what I’ve read is wonderful. I’m so excited about it, I would love to find a group of women who want to dig in and find God’s word.

I couldn’t get past the subtitle: flawed yet called. Who can’t relate to that?

Here’s what I know for sure: the author, Andy Lee, is a student of the Word, a lover of Jesus, a servant with a huge heart and burden for women. I follow Andy’s daily bites of bread on Facebook and look forward each morning to her breaking open the Word live on Periscope.

This one is going to be good.

Book Review: Intentional Warfare

Book Review Intentional Warfare.jpg

The goal of this book is to increase awareness of believers’ daily spiritual battles. Life, for the believer, is about battle training and being battle ready. According to Ms. Scro, being ready doesn’t happen overnight and only as we intentionally continue to grow.

This book has a great balance of scripture and personal experience. It is practical and pragmatic, not a dry how to book.

Included with each chapter are exercises that give the reader opportunity to train and try the principles being taught.

Book review Mary G Scro.jpg

I especially appreciated the format the author used. WARFARE is not just the theme, it is the outline and checklist for readiness. I like this because it makes it easier to learn the points and put them into practice.

The author also included an appendix that contained a list of her favorite books on prayer, spiritual warfare, and other related topics. I find these helpful in understanding what and who has influenced an author.

I recommend this book for believers seeking to go deeper in their understanding of and need for being spiritually armed and ready.

I received a copy of this book from the author in return for an honest review.

Ordinary Moments with God: Laughing at the Unexpected

IMG_20160105_091920906

I get the munchies sitting at my desk. I’ve been trying to eat better. I was debating between baby carrots and banana chips this morning. Banana chips won.

I reached into the cupboard looking for the opening bag, but I couldn’t find it. So I threw this bag in my lunch bag and headed out the door.

Later when the munchies hit, I pulled out the bag. I kept trying to rip off the top. Isn’t that the way most of these bags open?

Where was the tab? I didn’t want to ruin the zip closure. I like zip closures.

Why wouldn’t it it open?

I was about to grab my scissors when I realized: I already opened the bag. The pull tab couldn’t be found because it wasn’t there.

I opened the bag and poured out some chips to snack on–all the while laughing at myself.

The bag didn’t open the way I expected. I’m used to tearing off the top–so something must be wrong with the bag.

The answer was staring me in the face, but I couldn’t see it.

How many times do I respond the same with God?

Truth be told? Way more than I care to admit.

The verse that came to mind as I contemplated not trusting in my expectations was Proverbs 3:5-6

WP proverbs 3 5-6.jpg

If I want to get things right, surrendering my way of thinking, expecting, and understanding is the way to go. His path not mine.

PRAYER: God, I get so used things being certain ways. I’m comfortable with the familiar. Turning loose of what I know and understand is not easy, but it makes the most sense in the long run. Direct my paths and help me to be more “open” to the unexpected. Amen.