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In my life I’ve had one pair of shoes that fit perfectly—or as close as one can get without having the shoes made specifically for them. It happened over twenty years ago. I was in a discount chain store that was popular then and I happened upon a pair of tennis shoes that weren’t made to be a pair. I was ecstatic with my find! The left foot was an 8 ½ and the right was an 8. Someone had created this “perfect pair” because they had the opposite need from my own. You see, the second toe on my left foot is just long enough to make wearing an 8 a bit painful, while an 8 ½ is too big for my right foot.

Have you ever wondered who or how they created the sizing industry? Have you noticed that clothing in more expensive stores is larger than in discount stores? Have you ever tried to fit into “One Size Fits All”? Have seen how they’ve tried to make that more politically correct by printing the tag with “One Size Fits Most.” Actually, I think it’s more like “One Size Fits Very Few.” In days gone by shoes were cobbled to fit the person just as clothes were tailored individually. These days it seems like the only shoes that are individually made are for people with specific orthopedic or medical needs and they’re incredibly expensive. Tailoring is the way to go to get clothes that fit—but try to find a tailor!

Tucked away in one of my favorite passages is a reassurance to me that God understands my frustration. Jesus looks out at the crowd that has gathered around him and he is moved with compassion, and he utters the familiar and oft quoted, Matthew 11:28-30: “Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”

In one of the earliest sermons I ever preached I referred to this passage and the process of tailor-making the yokes for the oxen that the farmer in Jesus’ day would have used. The process was exacting because the farmer wanted to be sure that the yoke fit perfectly so that the oxen would be able to get the job done without the annoyance of an Ill-fitting yoke.

It is a very freeing thing to realize that God has created and gifted us all individually and uniquely and then placed us exactly where he needs us to be. He not only tailor makes us, he orchestrates the mix of gifts within families, congregations, communities.

Unfortunately, it is our tendency to lean toward frustration when we understand what God is doing. We feel we’re not being used because we don’t see the picture from God’s perspective. We get out of sync when we feel we are being underused or overburdened, when the truth is if we allow God, he will make things just right. He wants to show us. He wants us to catch his rhythm. 

That same excitement I found when I discovered my “perfect pair” of shoes is what God offers me, and you every day. He has made this day perfectly for you. If you walk through it in his rhythm you will find out how perfectly it fits. Will you watch him? Will you learn from him? Will you see it through his eyes instead of your frustration? Surrender your expectation that one size day fits all and find his perfect fit for you.

One of the things I loved about working out at Curves was the fun we had getting fit.  While we were sweating and stretching ourselves we were also laughing.  I remember a time when we seemed to be enjoying each other more than usual.  In the middle of our laughter one of the ladies quipped, “If my husband knew how much fun I was having he wouldn’t let me come here.”  In the moment I laughed it off, but the more I thought about it, the more it bothered me.  Reflecting on it now, I think I’m beginning to understand why.

This woman’s husband seems a bit like a parishioner in the last church I pastored.  He was of the mindset that there was no room for laughter in church.  This typically put us at odds.  I’m a giggler.  I laugh a lot.  I laugh loudly.  I snicker.  I love to make people laugh.  I’ve been told that laughter is good medicine, so the people around me should be healthier.  

I think that Jesus had a very intense personality.  I think the scriptures portray him with very real emotions.  This same Jesus who overturned the tables of the money changers wept with his friends and with the widow whose son had died.  Jesus was moved with compassion when he looked out over the crowds.  He felt their helplessness and hopelessness.  But he was also invited to weddings and dinner parties.  People wanted to be around Jesus.  He knew how to be with children.  

I believe Jesus laughed.  I love the pictures of Jesus where he is smiling and laughing.  There are far more pictures of Jesus looking solemn and serious and some think that’s the only way he should be portrayed.  Salvation is serious business after all.  And I couldn’t agree more, it is serious, but did you know that there are over 240 references to joy in the Bible?  Job speaks of laughter being restored.  David prayed that God would restore the joy of his salvation.  Jesus reminded his disciples that he had come to make their joy complete.  James picks up on this and tells us to count it ALL joy!  Good and bad, pain and pleasure, win or lose.  The joy of the Lord is my strength.  

There is room for joy in your journey.  There is room for laughter at church.  You can enjoy your relationship with God.  Go ahead and celebrate life.  It doesn’t make the bad things go away, but it does take away their power over you.  It’s a little like working out at Curves.  Laughter doesn’t mean we won’t sweat, but while we do we will find reason to laugh, to rejoice, to enjoy.  So thank God for laughter today and make sure to share some with someone you love.

In my quiet time this morning, thinking Lenten type thoughts on confession and accountability, I remembered a quote made by Dr. Charles Munson in my first seminary preaching course. I was pastoring my first church and felt like such an absolute rookie, but I was also a sponge: absorbing everything thrown at me. Dr. Munson said this: “There are no secret disciples.  Either the disciple will kill the secret, or the secret will kill the disciple.”  

There are no secret disciples, because disciples can’t be secret—they’re accountable…to someone.

Not long ago, I was reading my “Writer’s Digest” magazine and I came upon information regarding their spring writing contests. I thought to myself: I could do that. The longer I thought, the clearer it became that I was probably was going to do it. Then I did a little more research, gave it a little more thought, and by evening I told my husband about my intention. Now I’m locked in. He won’t let me forget. And that’s exactly why I told him: he will hold my feet to the fire of accountability.

Back when I began my Christian journey, I was taught the ABC’s of faith: accept, believe, and confess. We can do the first two privately, but the third sends us straight into accountability. Do you see that as good or bad? When I was still working as a family counselor, I worked with an agency that had several therapists at varying levels of experience and licensure. One of the counselors who had achieved “Independent” licensure status chaffed at the thought of being supervised like a ‘rookie.’  She felt she was beyond that and resented someone looking over her shoulder.   I was a rookie at the time, so I was used to having my work scrutinized. I learned as I moved up the ladder that not being supervised was not in my best interest.

I  believe Jesus understood just how much his followers would need to be accountable to each other—then and now. After the Resurrection, just before he ascended, Jesus instructed his followers to stay in the Upper Room until Pentecost.  Imagine the scene.  These people had to learn how to be together.  There were so many different kinds of folks.  Trust was the furthest thing from their minds or experiences.  Zealots, tax collectors, ex-prostitutes, and fishermen had to learn to get along.  Miraculously, it worked.  They were able to connect and when they did a power came on them like one this world had never seen.  

What happened in that room?  I think they learned to tell their story, the story of what Jesus had done for them, done in them.  And they learned to listen.  They talked about their dreams and what they hoped to accomplish with their lives for God and for the Kingdom.  They told their secrets and became accountable to one another.  And it changed the world.

What secret desires has God been wanting to unwrap and unleash in your life?  Tell someone.  Get accountable.  Allow God to work.  You may be surprised at what power you free up to blow through your life and the lives around you! 

This is what I have today. Just a very simple Poohism. Remember no one can stay your joy. You can only give it away.

Today I will breathe deeply. Smile hugely. And laugh much. Not because there is more in my life that will encourage or make that possible. I could look at the negative all day long, end up discouraged, disillusioned, and depressed.

Or…

I will notice the crocus and think on its promise of Spring.

I will observe a kindness shared and share one myself as a result and revel in the joy it brings another.

I will discover that the coffee establishment I have a gift card to is now featuring my favorite flavored cold brew and I will relish each sip.

These and so many more.

How will you enjoy today?

May these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart
    be pleasing in your sight,
    Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer. (Psalms 19:14, NIV)

I had an interesting conversation recently. Instead of sitting at my desk and writing, I went and had coffee with another pastor. As we were finishing our time, he asked me for ideas on how to handle a situation. He prefaced his question by saying he didn’t really expect me to have an immediate answer, but…Then he went on to ask me about how to help a youth change a behavior.

To his surprise I came up with that unexpected immediate answer based on my training and experience. I harkened back to a principle that an organization I worked with used with their youth: 4 to 1. For each 1x a correction is given there needs to be 4 positives made about the youth reaching that target behavior. It is a very intentional teaching method, that can at times seem exhausting.

After our meeting, I ran an errand and stopped in at the church to make a phone call and use the bathroom. All in all I was out and about for almost an hour and a half. The entire time I mulled over the final moments of our conversation.

The more I thought, the more I began to talk to God…or listen as I heard my words coming back at me regarding my own self-talk.

I don’t know about you, but I don’t always speak kindly to myself. I’m pretty good at scolding myself, putting myself down, and berating me. I know I don’t use the 4/1 method on myself. But why not?

What might happen if instead replaying the negative thoughts tape, we caught ourselves doing well? Spoke more words of encouragement. Celebrated more moments of success…with ourselves.

I’m sure there are those who vehemently caution against such nonsense. Warning that it would only lead to pride, and self-aggrandizement. (Insert sad sigh here.)

I’m not advocating for arrogance. I would speak against any attitude that keeps us from being aware of our brokenness before God. Our verse today is not merely about the thoughts and words we have for others. I wonder how pleased God is with how we speak to ourselves. Think about these statements from I’ve mulled on from Psalms:

Who am I that you (the creator and sustainer of the universe) should be aware of me? Among all the amazing things you have created and loved I (that’s you and me) am one. (see Psalm. 8)

This body you made is amazing God. Your human creation is incredibly made, fashioned and functioning–differently but diversity is part of the plan. (read Psalm 139)

So today, I invite you (and me) to listen to what we say to ourselves. Make sure that your words and thoughts, actions and attitudes are pleasing to God. Shoot for the goal of 4 positives for every negative/correction. Be your best encourager.

(Yes, it’s almost lunch. I’m sorry. All morning, though I knew it was Friday and showed up for a Friday appointment, I was convinced today was Saturday. So, while it is still Friday, here’s today’s post.)

This is the image most closely associated with Jesus prayer in the Garden of Gethsemene. Serenely praying for God’s will to be done. Asking for this bitter cup to pass him by. He acquiesces, and declares that if it cannot, he would follow God’s plan.

So when it comes to praying about God’s will we have this kind of image. It’s tranquil, full of obeience and peace.

And yet these are the words Dr. Luke uses to describe the scene:

Jesus left and made his way to the Mount of Olives, as was his custom, and the disciples followed him. When he arrived, he said to them, “Pray that you won’t give in to temptation.”  He withdrew from them about a stone’s throw, knelt down, and prayed. He said, “Father, if it’s your will, take this cup of suffering away from me. However, not my will but your will must be done.” Then a heavenly angel appeared to him and strengthened him.  He was in anguish and prayed even more earnestly. His sweat became like drops of blood falling on the ground.  When he got up from praying, he went to the disciples. He found them asleep, overcome by grief. He said to them, “Why are you sleeping? Get up and pray so that you won’t give in to temptation (Luke 22:39-46, CEB).”

Or Matthew’s account:

Then Jesus went with his disciples to a place called Gethsemane. He said to the disciples, “Stay here while I go and pray over there.”  When he took Peter and Zebedee’s two sons, he began to feel sad and anxious. Then he said to them, “I’m very sad. It’s as if I’m dying. Stay here and keep alert with me.” Then he went a short distance farther and fell on his face and prayed, “My Father, if it’s possible, take this cup of suffering away from me. However—not what I want but what you want.”

He came back to the disciples and found them sleeping. He said to Peter, “Couldn’t you stay alert one hour with me? Stay alert and pray so that you won’t give in to temptation. The spirit is eager, but the flesh is weak.” A second time he went away and prayed, “My Father, if it’s not possible that this cup be taken away unless I drink it, then let it be what you want.”

Again he came and found them sleeping. Their eyes were heavy with sleep. But he left them and again went and prayed the same words for the third time.  Then he came to his disciples and said to them, “Will you sleep and rest all night? Look, the time has come for the Human One to be betrayed into the hands of sinners.  Get up. Let’s go. Look, here comes my betrayer (Matthew 26:36-46, CEB).”

Neither of those pictures above seem to adequately portray the intensity of Jesus as he worked his way to surrender. I read of anguish, struggle, drops of blood.

There would be those who say nothing we could surrender would equal what Jesus gave up in this prayer. And while I agree that very few of us will be called to die an overwhelmingly painful and shame-filled death on a cross. Here’s what Jesus said:

Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me (Luke 9:23, NIV).

Sit with that for a while. Denying self is surrender, is nevertheless–it’s not my will by yours be done. It is as Jesus taught his followers: “your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.”

And there’s that part about taking up their cross DAILY and following the way that Jesus walked.

That may not be a struggle for everyone, but it might be.

What will it be for you?

Do you ever wonder why you commit to something? Maybe regret it? I confess I have, and sometimes do. Like: what was I thinking when I decided it would be a good thing to get up on Monday morning and write a blog post? But here we are.

I was surprised to learn from Snooze news, “people are most likely to hit “snooze” on Wednesday (40%), while only 28 percent are likely to do so on Monday (studyfinds.org, 4/29/22).” I thought for sure Monday would be the number one day statistically. After a weekend off, the temptation to keep hitting the snooze would be highest as we face the dreaded return to work.

Enter today’s mindset: Do It Anyway. Most of us push through, because we have to. Even when we don’t want to get up. Even when we don’t want to pay the fine. Even when we hurt all over. Even if it really doesn’t matter. Even if no one will notice. Even if they don’t deserve it.

Each week, every day, we are called upon to do something we don’t want to. Something that is either expected or necessary. And just because it’s the right thing, that won’t guarantee we will enjoy, appreciate it, or even be appreciated. Do it anyway.

I have carried around a small picture from my “Home Interiors” party days (circa 1987). When people are hard to love, don’t deserve it, or won’t even know, do it anyway.

I found this quote on my Twitter feed. It seemed to fit our mindset (and a recent one also):“My wish for you is that you continue. Continue to be who and how you are, to astonish a mean world with your acts of kindness.” – Maya Angelou

Finally, if we are to truly have a “do it anyway” mindset, we need this reminder, too: The Paradoxical Commandments. By Dr. Kent M. Keit

People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered.
Love them anyway.

If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.
Do good anyway.

If you are successful, you will win false friends and true enemies.
Succeed anyway.

The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow.
Do good anyway.

Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable.
Be honest and frank anyway.

The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds.

Think big anyway.

People favor underdogs but follow only top dogs.
Fight for a few underdogs anyway.

What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.
Build anyway.

People really need help but may attack you if you do help them.
Help people anyway.

Give the world the best you have and you’ll get kicked in the teeth.
Give the world the best you have anyway.

© Copyright Kent M. Keith 1968, renewed 2001

Discipline. Tough word for a Monday morning when we feel like we’re doing our best to crawl out of bed and make it to the bathroom, unsure of how we’ll ever make it to work–let alone through the rest of the day…or week ahead.

When I went looking for pics for today’s mindset word, the two above were among the most popular. The Olympic theme, or athletics in general were the strongest contender by sheer number. I was hoping to see more educational, piano playing, band practicing–anything that requires intentional striving for excellence.

What was totally missing included silence, study, prayer, service, meditation. You know, spiritual disciplines. Does the world even see them as disciplines?

Here’s what I know about discipline:

For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it (Hebrews 12:11).

Rather, be hospitable, a lover of good, self-controlled, upright, holy, and disciplined (Titus 1:8).

Think about it: Just as a parent disciplines a child, the LORD your God disciplines you for your own good (Deuteronomy 8:5).

As a child I shunned discipline. I didn’t try because I didn’t want to fail. But all that did was make me feel like a failure since all my friends were good at stuff because they learned the importance of hard work and achievement.

Getting older helped. I began to see some things I was good at and I’ve applied myself and created my niches. I realized I didn’t have to be good at everything and instead worked hard in certain areas.

One thing I have worked especially hard at is exercise–a discipline of my body. I have completed a time of daily exercise 976 days in a row. That seems to impress some folks and others merely dismiss it as excessive or as misdirected energy. For me, it’s neither. Exercising every day is a discipline which I find comforting and encouraging. I tend to make light when people ask why I keep going. I tell them I don’t want to start over. But even if I had to, I would.

Here’s the thing: discipline is a choice. I may not be able to control the outcome or result, I can make the choice to do it. And I’m better for it. Getting on the bike, or walking, or rowing isn’t always fun. Sometimes I’m soar or tired or busy. But I have tasted of the fruit of peace and strength. I’m not going to quit.

What disciplines to you nurture in your life? What do you gain from them?

Good morning! Good day. Good evening. It’s the start of another week. And I have a word and a thought for you. (And me, because I need it, too!)

What’s the first thing that comes to your mind when I ask: Do you have any Karens in your life?

How many immediately thought of the caricatures so prevalent in our media of out of control, obnoxious, vile, often racial, overly entitled women screaming at some innocent worker or person they feel has wronged them or that is in the wrong place? It breaks my heart that the name I associate with some of the kindest, gentlest people would be portrayed in such a derogatory manner. Let’s create a new name so no one else uses when it comes time to name their baby. Because I can’t think of a new name, and won’t take my friends’ name in vain, I’m going to use Cruella–forgive me if that’s your Aunty’s name.

As we launch into this week, there will be many Cruellas who will cross our paths. What do we do with them? How would treat them? But even more than the ravings of the entitled, there will be wounded folks. People who are grieving, hurting, lost, and alone. How will we treat them?

It’s easy to be all up in our heads. Maybe having our own issues–too many issues to care about anyone else. How do we want to be treated? I’m imagining that we all can do with a little more kindness. And if that’s what we are needing, maybe even craving, imagine how much others need and crave it, too.

Your mission for today (hear the music in the background?) is to see Jesus in every (yep, I mean all of them–even Cruella) person you encounter. Because that’s Jesus’ lesson from Matthew 25 (check it out if you don’t believe me). And when you see Jesus (because he’s there), plant a seed of kindness. It’s might take an extra minute–isn’t Jesus worth that much?

And keep these words in your heart and mind, because you will never regret being kind:

If you need a theme song for today, try this one: https://youtu.be/vfLOG8qkuqY