Author: tinamhunt

ESFP with a dash of ADD. Lover of the Word and words. The cup of my life is neither half empty or half full--it overflows! I'm blessed to be a blessing and I'm here to share the journey.

Day Sixteen: Boredom’s Cure

(Sorry for the lapse.  Computer and then internet issues have sought to sabotage my commitment to daily writing.  Thank you for hanging in there with me.)

Being bored has never been a good thing. When I was a kid, if I told my mom I was bored, she would gladly find me something to do…and it was never pleasant. Remembering this, I did what all mothers do: I passed the same trick along to my children, foster children, and grandchildren. The mere threat of my finding something for them to do generally cured any malaise.

So what about me? How as an adult do I do battle with boredom? I began by considering the antonyms for boredom, as suggested by dictionary.com: amuse; thrill, enrapture. Hmmm. The last few days I’ve been amusing myself with my new Nook Tablet. I have enjoyed learning its intricacies and capabilities. That has been good. Thrill? Not big into thrills. I wasn’t blessed with an abundance of curiosity or daring. I’m not even sure I’ve thought of thrill in a positive light for a very long time. Lately all I can think of is saying that I’m not thrilled about something or other, usually about feeling like I have no choices. My time doesn’t seem to belong to me. I don’t have any pocket money to blow. What would I do if my time were my own? Would it be thrilling to make a few choices? To say no when everyone expects me to say yes? Hmmm.

Enraptured. Now there’s something to think about. I just dashed over to dictionary.com again to check whether I really knew what the word meant. To me it’s an all encompassing kind of word. It’s a feeling of being lost in something. It’s an experience engaging all my senses.

One of the actual definitions is: to delight beyond measure. And therein, as my mother would say, lies the rub. I’m not feeling much joy these days. I can’t tell you why or when joy took a hiatus, but I’m definitely missing it.

So I turned to the scriptures to find my cure. First stop, Psalms. Now I realized I was feeling like David in Psalm 13. He was one depressed dude. But in the end he returns to the source of his faith. Later he reminds himself in Psalm 37 not to worry about how good the other guy has it but trust in God who will give him the delight of his heart. Finally I landed in Psalm 51, where David writes: Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me. I had trouble finding the verse. I put in several different combinations and each one included: the joy of my salvation. Now that little difference may not jump out at you, but it spoke volumes to me.

Do you wear glasses? I do. I started wearing glasses when I was 40. I’ve always had trouble with my eyes (4 corrective eye muscle surgeries before I was 9), so I was familiar with the ocular device where the doctor asks you to consider which lens is clearer, “This one or this one? This one or this one? This one or this one?” This part of the examination seems to take forever, and some of the differences are so minute that they’re practically indistinguishable.

That’s what I started thinking about as I considered the difference between “my salvation” and “your salvation.” How much difference can one word really make? For me, in this case, a huge difference. As I reflected, I realized that I was once again at that place where I want things the way I want them. I had been relying upon my wisdom, my strength, my salvation. Interesting side note: I just spelled that slavation–as if doing it my made me a slave to my self and didn’t provide what I needed most: salvation from the only one who can truly provide it, now and forever. No wonder I had lost my joy.

I wish I could say that I have determined three steps to reach my goal of restored joy. Wouldn’t that be nice? Right now, all I can muster is a determination to seek after God and his salvation through greater dependence on the word and more time in direct communication with him in prayer. And trust me, I’ll let you know where that gets me. Shalom.

Day Thirteen: Routine

Do you have certain things in your routine that you just have to do or you feel disjointed or incomplete? For some, they have to read the morning paper or watch the early news first thing in the morning. Some can’t get going without their first cup of coffee. Others have a bathroom routine that is scripted down to the minute. The same can be said for how they face the things of work or how they wind down in their day.

Right before my husband and I got married we saw a movie about an ice skater who went blind. It was called “Ice Castles.” As she practiced with her partner, over and over, to drill the performance into her body, he reminded her that she could do this. As they skated out on the ice at competition, he squeezed her hand and whispered the word, “Routine.” When Nelson and I were married that is what he had engraved on the inside of my wedding band.

Now, there are some who might see that as negative or sarcastic. I mean, really, who wants their relationship to become “routine”? People are always looking for fresh and new. Manufacturers understand that and are always seeking to make their product “new and improved.” Routine typically carries with it connotations of complacency and boredom. I don’t happen to see it that way.

Having a routine helps me feel grounded and safe. I like the predictability and security of knowing what is supposed to come next. Thankfully, though, I’m not completely locked into that. Some people absolutely loose it if you change their routine. In their minds, the whole day is shot if their routine is disrupted. Somewhere along the way I developed the ability to toss my routine and be adaptable and flexible. It’s helped me survive.

I believe that God wants to offer us this balance between predictability and adaptability. We can count on him. The Word tells us that he is the same “yesterday and forever” and that he will “never leave us or forsake us.” Because we know that we learn to trust him in the “no matter whats” of life. When we are hit with an unexpected curveball in our health, finances, career, or relationships that require we adapt, we can because there is a source of stability that will get us through the uncertainty back to what feels “routine.” And it may be, that we learn to create a new “routine”, new patterns and rituals based on the new growth we experience as a result of trust.

There’s an old hymn that reminds us: “We have an anchor that keeps the soul, steadfast and sure while the billows roll. Fastened to the rock that cannot move, grounded firm and deep in the Savior’s love.” As you move through your day and your daily routine, be thankful for what you can count on and open to the possibilities for growth and grace. Even an openness to new can become routine!

Lent Day Eleven: What happened to Nine?

Did you even miss it?  Day nine, that is.  My day just absolutely got away from me.  From get go to done, I felt like I was racing down a neverending hill, faster and faster, until I was crashing into my bed way later than my normal, sane bedtime. 

I don’t like days like that.  I like days that follow the plan, that leave me room for the things I want to get done, but also leave me room to breathe.  I used to thrive on days that seemed to go 90 mph–not so much anymore.  The best kind of days have space for breathing and thinking, for noticing and appreciating, for me and the people I care about.

The problem is: I can’t blame the day, even though that would be easier.  I’m the one who allowed things to move in and crowd out the things I enjoy and the things I wanted (needed) to get done.  I was the one who didn’t say no.  I was the one who attempted to squeeze one more thing in.  I was the one who allowed the urgent to steamroll right over the important.

I remember when I learned the difference.  It was many years ago, reading Charles Swindoll’s book “Strengthening Your Grip.” He had a whole chapter about learning to differentiate between the urgent and the important.  It was a lesson that hit me and has stuck all these thirty years later.  The problem is that I tend to realize much too late that I got myself into a situation that warrants my paying closer attention to what’s happening.  Sure, I can adjust, but isn’t it better to be proactive rather than always reactive?

Can you tell the difference between the urgent and the important?  Oh, I wouldn’t even pretend to believe that there won’t be those moments when my holding to the important won’t be interupted by the urgent.  The problem is when I sacrifice the important things, the truly valuable (especially as it relates to my spiritual life) on a continual basis to what “appears” to be urgent.  This happens for me, this giving into what only appears urgent, but truly isn’t, when what is really important is also difficult.  I can easily allow myself to be distracted to avoid the work of doing what is important.

Is the whole Lenten experience important to you? Or is it easier to get sidetracked by the pressing matters of the day?  How is your prayer experience?  Do you hold to regular quiet time with God?  You feel like you should, you want to, but as important as it is, you just can’t seem to keep that appointment with him–so many other things…too many other things.

One thing that I’ve realized, too slowly I’m afraid, is that God thinks that time is important, too.  And more importantly, He will help me keep those appointments.  He will give us the desire of our heart.  If we will trust that and live into that, I believe there will be far fewer missing day nines and much greater depth and breadth in our spiritual life and journey.  Go ahead, ask Him and see what He’ll do.

Lent Day Ten: What’s That Smell?

15For we are to God the aroma of Christ among those who are being saved and those who are perishing (2 Corinthians 2:15, NIV).

I used to work in a gas station convenience store. I always knew when it was 3:15 because a certain woman came to buy a cappuccino on her way to work and she wore a distinctive perfume. After spending a shift in a stale aired place catching her scent always made me smile.  Not every smell was quite as pleasant. I knew when the vet students came in from the farms. I knew when the stoners were making a run for munchies. I knew when the newspaper delivery guy who was a chain smoker walked into the shop. And don’t get me started on the bathrooms.

Smells are incredibly powerful and can evoke all kinds of emotions. Experts tell us that before a child can ever really distinguish her mother’s face she knows her mother’s smell. My neighborhood was full of the smells of barbeque grilling this past weekend. All kinds of memories can be evoked by the smell of homemade bread or fresh from the oven chocolate chip cookies. Home sellers are encouraged to create very pleasant smells in their homes when prospective buyers are touring.

People can be very sensitive to smells. It is considered selfish and inconsiderate in social settings for people to wear fragrances due to allergies and extreme sensitivities. What was once thought to be pleasant and appropriate can now result in exacerbating asthma attacks. I love my husband’s aftershave but I can’t convince him that less is better. He seems to be unable to smell a single spritz so he crosses a line into overkill and overpower.

So, how does that fit in with Paul’s teaching about our being the aroma of Christ? It reminded me of walking into our home recently. My husband had marinated some salmon and had it baking in the oven. The smell made me salivate and envision a very delicious dinner. Our younger daughter stopped by to drop something off and immediately screwed up her nose and complained about the awful fishy smell. How could it be both?

Our lives as believers will leave an impression. For some, it will be pleasant. For others, however, it will be considered stench. We can be considerate to not overpower, but we cannot afford to allow political correctness or social convention to rob us or dilute the truth of who we are in Christ. Be sensitive but always be sweet in the eyes of God.

Lent Day Eight: Naive

On more than one occasion, I have been accused of being naïve, so I went and looked up the meaning.

According to dictionary.com:
1. having or showing unaffected simplicity of nature or absence of artificiality; unsophisticated; ingenuous.
2. having or showing a lack of experience, judgment, or information; credulous: She’s so naive she believes everything she reads. He has a very naive attitude toward politics.
3. having or marked by a simple, unaffectedly direct style reflecting little or no formal training or technique: valuable naive 19th-century American portrait paintings.
4. not having previously been the subject of a scientific experiment, as an animal.
I think I’m ok with that. But that wasn’t always the case.

Back in the mid-nineties, I felt led to pursue my Doctor of Ministries degree. It seemed like the logical thing to do. I applied to the denominational seminary of the church I was a part of. I completed the first seminar and was totally in love with being back in school again. I raced into the second course with all kinds of enthusiasm and anticipation. Unfortunately, I ran headlong into a professor who rigidly held to position and style of teaching. I wasn’t deep enough or reflective enough. I didn’t see things his way. He wanted to fail me. I worked hard in the course and tried to present my position and perspective. I was told that if I was hoped to advance in the process I would have to learn to “jump through the hoops” placed before me. I’m not a very good jumper, so I dropped out of the program.

I’m especially happy that my brand of naivety includes the fourth definition from the list above! But the more I think about it, the more I believe that Jesus was looking for a certain level of naiveté from his own. Do you remember when the disciples were trying to identify their own importance, and how Jesus put them in their place?

1At that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, “Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?”
2He called a little child and had him stand among them. 3And he said: “I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. 4Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. (Matthew 18:1-4, NIV)

I’d rather be simple than cynical, or arrogant. I’d rather be real than artificial (reminds me of Paul’s instruction to the Romans that their love was to be without hypocrisy). I want to be credulous. I want to be ready to believe and to trust. I especially want that kind of relationship with the creator of the universe who invites you and me to call him, “Daddy.”

Lent Day Seven: Accountability

In seminary, the first time around, I took a preaching course with Dr. Charles Munson. I was pastoring my first church and such an absolute rookie. One day in class, he made this statement: “There are no secret disciples. Either the disciple will kill the secret, or the secret will kill the disciple.”

When that quote came to mind this morning, I was thinking about confession and accountability. Yesterday I was reading my “Writer’s Digest” magazine and I came upon information regarding their spring writing contests. I thought to myself: I could do that. The longer I thought it became: I’m going to do that. I did a little more research and gave it a little more thought and then come evening I told my husband. Now I’m locked in. He won’t let me forget. And that’s exactly why I told him: he will hold my feet to the fire of accountability.

I was taught the ABC’s of faith were: accept, believe, and confess. We can do the first two privately, but the third sends us straight into accountability. Do you see that as good or bad? When I was still working as a family counselor, I worked with an agency that had several therapists with several levels of experience and licensure. There was a woman there who had “Independent” status who chaffed at the thought of supervision. She felt she was beyond that and resented someone looking over her shoulder. I was a rookie at the time so I was used to having my work scrutinized. Later, it was lack of accountability that had disastrous results.

I love the account of the disciples hanging out in the Upper Room until Pentecost. Imagine the scene. These folks had to learn how to be together. There were so many different kinds of folks. Trust was the furthest thing from their minds or experiences. Zealots, tax collectors, ex-prostitutes, and fishermen had to learn to get along. Miraculously, it worked. They were able to connect and when they did a power came on them like one this world had never seen.

What happened in that room? I think they learned to tell their story, the story of what Jesus had done for them, done in them. And they learned to listen. They talked about their dreams and what they hoped to accomplish with their lives for God and for the Kingdom. They told their secrets and became accountable to one another. And it changed the world.

What secret desires has God been wanting to unwrap and unleash in your life? Tell someone. Get accountable. Allow God to work. You may be surprised at what power you free up to blow through your life and the lives around you!

Lent Day Six: Self-Denial

My life has been in a kind of Lent mode for quite some time. I’ve been living without some indulgences due to money crunching. Living on a budget forces us to really think about what is necessary and what can wait or not even be considered.

Interestingly, I was thinking about this on my way to work. I passed the gas station where I occasionally stopped for a tasty cappuccino. Before I knew it, I was driving by McDonald’s and I’m almost positive I heard a hazelnut iced coffee screaming out my name. But I just kept driving; and thinking as I drove. As I grew up I heard of people “giving up” chocolate or pizza for Lent. This year, Church Leaders were recommending to the faithful that they give up technology (computers, internet, and texting). I had trouble then and now making the spiritual connection between the items given up and God.

Did you give up something for Lent? Why? The purpose of giving something up is to make room for something else. Just as when we fast, we forego food to focus on God. As I thought about it I was reminded of the time when the Pharisees accused Jesus of casting out the demon by the power of Beelzebub. Through the story we’re warned of the danger of simply casting out something, in that case evil, without filling it up with something of God.

When I was in college one of my dearest friends challenged me to consider self denial. She made reference to Jesus’ instruction to the disciples to deny themselves and take up their cross (Mark 8:34). While many point to the cross as burden or pain, it has also been suggested that it is about mission and purpose. Understanding this began to help me put the pieces together.

I guess it could be about chocolate or the internet if the pursuit of those things keeps me from fulfilling my purpose. To know that, though, I believe I’m going to have to know what my mission is. Many years ago, as I began my ministry I felt directed to verse in Colossians as a guide for me as a pastor and as a person. Paul wrote: 2My purpose is that they may be encouraged in heart and united in love, so that they may have the full riches of complete understanding, in order that they may know the mystery of God, namely, Christ (Colossians 2:2).

These days, I have more time to live into what I think that verse is calling me to do and be. Each day as I reflect, I’m shone the things that I have planned that can keep me from fulfilling my purpose. If I am going to live as true follower of Christ, I’m going to have to give those things up, deny my selfish interests, and live on purpose for Christ. Personally, that’s something I have to do daily, just as Jesus invited me to do.

Do you know what your purpose, your mission is? Have you thought about what is holding you back from fulfilling your calling in Christ? Set it down and let Him fill you up!

Lent Day Five: Mindfulness

I was reading an article in a magazine about the benefits of mindfulness. Did you know:
-A study showed in 140 binge eaters mindfulness reduced binging 75%.
-Mindfulness eases anxiety by 44% and depression by 34% while increasing immunity.
-Mindfulness improves physical functioning and reduces pain.
-Mindfulness results in significant improvement in memory.
-Mindfulness strengthens relationships. (Prevention Magazine, January 2008)

Pretty impressive. Pretty good reasons to consider being mindful. What does it mean? According to dictionary.com, mindfulness is defined as: attentive, aware, or careful. I am of the opinion that this word, concept and practice, is very biblical.
Paul tells the Romans to be transformed by the renewing of their minds (12:2) and directs the Philippians to think on what is “whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy” (4:8). A quick search of “take care” brings up 117 references in the Old and New Testaments.

So it behooves us to “pay attention” in life. What have you been noticing as you race through life? What have you heard? What have you felt? There’s a current tissue commercial where a woman is going through her day with a “touch, touch, touch, touch…feel” experience. The point is we bump through life barely aware of the things we touch and that touch us. And just as the woman finally came across the best tissue and it caused her to feeeeeel something more deeply, we can come into the presence of the Almighty. Talk about feeling!

The Psalms assure us that God neither slumbers nor sleeps. David is overwhelmed by God’s attentiveness and questions in Psalm 8: who are we that you are mindful of us? Nothing happens in our lives, but God is aware. He knows when we are up all night. He knows when our job is about to phase out. He knows what the doctor just told us. He knows. And he is mindful, attentive and caring.

Today, don’t just bump mindlessly through your appointments and contacts, your shopping and banking. Yesterday, we were invited to look. Now, we are invited to be mindful of the one who is mindful of us.

Lent Day Four: Here’s Looking At You

When I worked at Curves, one of the first things we would do with new members (after we orient them to the whole program) is complete a figure analysis. Basically, we would have them mount the dreaded weight determiner and grab the tape measure to find out the sum total of their girth. Did that sound ominous? It was supposed to. The dread that most of those women feel in that moment is colossal. They had spent so much time and energy avoiding the truth, that it was a very scary and humbling task to meet it—and in the presence of another person, yet!

Perhaps you’ve never thought of it this way, but it’s very easy to not see what you don’t look at. How many of you read your food labels? Before you sign off on something, do you read all the fine print? The list could go on and on of things external, but what about things within? On the one hand, we could consider all the health signals that we’ve ignored, the doctor’s visits we’ve postponed because we didn’t want to hear what they had to say. Then there’s the stuff of spirit and emotions that we’ve opted not look at either. The AA people understand the importance of that honest self-inventory. What about relationships that we’ve ignored?

James invites us to the mirror: 22 But don’t just listen to God’s word. You must do what it says. Otherwise, you are only fooling yourselves. 23 For if you listen to the word and don’t obey, it is like glancing at your face in a mirror. 24 You see yourself, walk away, and forget what you look like. 25 But if you look carefully into the perfect law that sets you free, and if you do what it says and don’t forget what you heard, then God will bless you for doing it. (James 1:22-25)

So here’s your homework. Yes, homework. Carve out a few minutes from your very hectic schedule—that busyness is part of the problem. We stay busy to avoid having to give ourselves—and God more than a passing glance. You could sit at a table with pen and paper or you could stand in front of a full-length mirror. Do what works for you. But do this: ask God what you need to see. Ask for his forgiveness at avoiding, denying, and running. Stay long enough to hear his answers. Let him tell you how wonderful you are and how much he loves you. Then commit to giving him more than a passing glance.

Take that kind of time and you won’t forget it—or regret it.

Lent Day Three: How Long?

 

Hab. 3:2 O Lord, I have heard of your reknown, and I stand in awe, O Lord, of your work. In our own time revive it; in our own time make it known; in wrath may you remember mercy.

Many years ago, on a Saturday night, I turned to my husband and asked if he would bring a step ladder to church the next morning because I needed it for my sermon. The odd look he gave me was only momentary, he was used to my unusual requests when it came to sermons.

I was preaching from Habakkuk, the part where he went up into his prayer tower and asked God, “How long?” I used the ladder as my prayer tower and I asked God, “How long?”

I don’t always need a tower, or a ladder to ask that of God. Lately, each time I drive by a gas station I ask. I’ve found myself asking as my heart is breaking over the strained relationship between father and daughter. I ask as I listen to my friend tell me of her heartache over her very ill and aging parent. How long, God? How long will this go on? How long must I endure this? How long do they have to suffer? How long will they remain stubborn and separated? How long? How long?

I have never really understood the timing of God. I know that He is neither early or late. Mary and Martha probably didn’t think that when they finally saw Jesus show up four days after Lazarus had died. Four days. Really Jesus? Is that how much you cared? You couldn’t have come sooner? Can’t you hear their questions? Perhaps you’ve asked questions like they did.

Jesus is unphased by their questioning. That gives me hope. Jesus didn’t scold them. Maybe that means, like Mary and Martha, like Habakkuk, it’s okay for me to ask all my “how longs” as well. Maybe in the asking I’ll come to the place where Habakkuk arrived. He had seen God work and knew that the plan was happening according to God’s timing, and that timing was just right.

I have never been any good at waiting. I get impatient. I want it now, whatever the latest “it” might be. What I have learned, painfully at times, is that right now is not always the best time, and what I want is not always God’s best for me. One look through the Old Testament should convince me of that. Just look at all the tragic stories that come from rushing God’s timing and plan.

So maybe this Lenten season is the time to wait. Don’t make any major purchases, or any long term commitments. Instead of giving into our spontaneity and compulsive nature, we should seek to get in tune with God’s timing. Afterall, according to Habakkuk, it’s a pretty awesome thing!